A Match Made in the Imperium

The Eldar Banshee stepped over the corpse of the Nob she had just gutted with her blade. Her wraithbone armor was pockmarked and charred where bullets, fire, and acid had tried to kill her. Her beloved helmet was long gone, a frag grenade had destroyed its comm system and she had to abandon it. The Banshee had come a long way to find her prize. She had fought many enemies, each seeking to take the artifact before her. Tyranid, Ork, Marine, it didn't matter what they were or how many, nothing would stop her and nothing did. Every foe she faced ended up the same. Each had been killed in the name of Khaine. Sheathing her sword, she stepped up to the altar and took the artifact. Raising it into the air, Mala let out her savage war cry…

"SQUEEEEEEEE!!!!!"

In another universe, the real one, stood a girl with long, bright red hair, black heels, a skirt, and a homemade shirt that said "Horus was a wuss and took it up the A$$" Mala grinned as she held the last copy of Dawn of War II in the store. The aisle was littered with the passed out and groaning forms of gamer boys. She kicked the one nearest her again.

"Stop your groaning. Take it like a girl."

Mala stepped on each of the bodies, relishing each and every grunt of pain as she walked up to the check-out counter. Cristo, the store owner shakes his head as he rings up the game.

"You know, if you weren't my best customer and if I thought I could keep you out of here, I would have kicked you out a long time ago."

Mala giggles as she hands over the money. "Aww… you know they like it. After all, it's the only contact with a girl they'll have until 2012."

Cristo raises his eyebrow and gives her the game. "Why? What happens in 2012?"

Mala grins horribly. "That is when the 40K MMORPG comes out." She cackles one last time and leaves the store.

Cristo takes a long pull from the bottle of Jack he kept under the counter and shuddered. He wasn't going to be able to sleep for the next few weeks.